I did not intend to write about this, but after recently reading the phrase "Love the sinner, but hate the sin." in a local paper's letter to the editor, it resurfaced within me the fact that there has always been something about that phrase that has bothered me. It sounds so Christian... on the surface. It sounds like something Jesus might say.... on the surface. It sounds like a biblical commandment.... on the surface. I have heard it for years, but I never liked it, and it wasn't until a couple of days ago that I think I figured out why. I am convinced it is NOT as Biblical or Christian, or something Jesus might say, as you might think. See if you agree.
Every time, when I read the phrase Love the sinner and hate the sin or I hear it being said, I always get the impression it is being said by someone who is really making a judgment about that person, and is trying to appear to demonstrate their Christian tolerance for the other's behavior. It never sounds to me like they really are loving the sinner, it always sounds to me as a way to voice their disapproval for the sinner without sounding judgmental.
I have most often heard it used when someone is talking about homosexuals, then it is usually followed by all kinds of verses about how wrong it is, and the consequences of those that practice that behavior, never is it mentioned how much they love the sinner. The funny thing is, that "love the sinner and hate the sin", is usually applied as a caveat for judgments about really big sins, committed by really big sinners! What about the little sins that we all commit? To sin means to miss the mark. To miss the mark is an archery term for the bulls eye on a target. If you were to fire an arrow at a target and miss the bulls eye you have missed the mark.
So what is the "mark" for the Christian? How about living fully from the Life of the Spirit within you. Wasn't that the standard that Jesus imposed in His sermon on the Mount? "Be perfect even as your Father in Heaven is perfect." How is THAT possible? The only way it is possible is when He lives His life fully within you! Otherwise it is impossible!
You may try your best to be perfect, and to fulfill all that you think is required of you, and the more you try one of two things will happen. First you will fail, but then you will set a standard (mark) you can reach, and then judge others for not meeting the same standard as you. Isn't that what the Pharisees did? They made an open show of all of their self proclaimed accomplishments. They kept the Law, or so they claimed, that is until Jesus said "But I say unto you, That whosoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment:" (Matt.5:22) Or what about the verse that gets just about every guy? "But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart." (vs28).
So then, are we to just ignore their sin? How about if we just let God judge them, and we just love them?
Okay, so then what are we to do then when faced with some of these situations where there are out right sinners sinning? My answer is to do what I believe the only thing the Scriptures command us to do and that is to "Love one another!" THAT'S IT. Period. End of story. No judging. No hating the sin. Just love.
Isn't that what Jesus really said? First He said that all the commandments can be summed up into just two. ‘You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.’ This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like it: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ (Matt. 22:36-38) Where in there is there any mention of hating the sinner's sin?
Tell you what. Just do that one thing. Love, and if you really truely love them, (as yourself) then tell me if you even notice their sin (or your own)? And if you tell me that you do, then I would be convinced that you cannot possibly be loving them in a true biblical manner. We are told to love our enemies! How can we do that and still focus on their sin?
How about 1 Peter 4:8 (KJV) "And above all things have fervent charity (Love) among yourselves: for charity shall cover the multitude of sins." How is your loving the sinner covering their sin, if you are too busy hating their sin?
No one can escape talking about 1Cor. 13 when talking about Love, since it is called the Love Chapter! What a lofty goal we might think, but I submit that if you can compare your loving the sinner to this chapter, and then still say "but hate the sin" as well, then you have defied any level of capability I can imagine.
The following is a quote from the Message Bible. 1Corinthians 13:4-8
Love never gives up.
Love cares more for others than for self.
Love doesn't want what it doesn't have.
Love doesn't strut,
Doesn't have a swelled head,
Doesn't force itself on others,
Isn't always "me first,"
Doesn't fly off the handle,
Doesn't keep score of the sins of others,
Doesn't revel when others grovel,
Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,
Puts up with anything,
Trusts God always,
Always looks for the best,
Never looks back,
But keeps going to the end.
Okay, so because I know these things to be true, does that mean I am living my life this way every day? The answer would be no. You see, I also believe that the only way it is possible to live this way at all even for a moment is when it is the Holy Spirit shining the light of His love from the inside out! So use this as a standard or a guide to know that when you, are not loving like that, then it is your own efforts and when you love that way at all, you know it is His Love working in you.
Let the Father love the sinner through you, and see if that Love is powerful enough to not only change the sinner, but that it also changes you as well.
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